PALM BEACH GARDENS, Fla. — Chris Kirk is not going to worry about the pressure of playing one of the most difficult courses on the PGA Tour this week. He would never look at a putt as life or death, even if it’s on the 18th green of the Champion Course Sunday with the Honda Classic title on the line.
That’s because two years ago Kirk, 35, faced a far more difficult, life-altering situation than winning a golf tournament.
Kirk took an indefinite leave from the sport in May 2019 to deal with alcohol abuse and depression. His life was getting out of control. He had attempted to put it back on track on his own and that was not working.
It was time to seek professional help.
When he returned in late 2019, after seven months away, suddenly the golf course grass was greener on the other side. That is only way to explain his mood shortly after squandering a chance to make a move at the Players Championship on Sunday when he entered the final round tied for eighth. He then shot himself out of the tournament with a 79 and finished 48th.
“Was I happy with that? Obviously not,” Kirk said Tuesday after playing nine holes at PGA National to prepare for Thursday’s start of the Honda Classic.
“I was frustrated and upset. But an hour after the round is over, it’s over and I’m able to just kind of move on and look at all the great things that have happened to me over the last few years.”
Chris Kirk plays a shot from a bunker on the first hole during the final round of the Arnold Palmer Invitational at Bay Hill Club and Lodge on March 07, 2021 in Orlando, Florida. (Photo: Sam Greenwood/Getty Images)
Kirk was able to focus on something else than where he would find that next drink. He focused on his oldest son, who was celebrating his birthday, and, as an Atlanta native, he focused on plans to attend a Braves spring training game on Monday.
“It’s just way easier now to move on from a bad day and realize it’s not the end of the world and get back excited for the next week,” he said
Kirk has been open about his story. He says he’s not “actively trying to send a message” but that talking about the darkest days of his life is cathartic.
Still, he is helping more than himself. His story is powerful and should be heard by anyone who has walked in his spikes. He has a platform each time he steps in front of a camera or a recorder, and the more people he can reach who are going down that same path, the more of an impact he can make.
“Anyone that’s been in my shoes will understand this, that your life just kind of becomes a lot of lies,” Kirk said. “It just feels good to be out there in the open and feel like I have nothing to hide.
“If anybody is going to take anything from my message or what I’m doing, it’s just to kind of realize that everybody has issues that they’re dealing with. It’s easy to portray us as a different class of citizen because we’re professional athletes, but that’s obviously not the case. Not for me, not for anybody out here. Everybody has stuff they’re going through.”
Chris Kirk is not Tiger Woods or Bryson DeChambeau or Justin Thomas, but he is a role model in another, and perhaps much more important and impactful, way.
In 2014, Kirk had career bests with two firsts and five top 10s and earned more than $4.8 million. His world ranking peaked at No. 16 and he made the President’s Cup in 2015.
Slowly, his game started a decline. So many nights sitting alone in hotel rooms were destroying his life.
“I was definitely to the point where I knew that I couldn’t keep going the way that I was going,” he said. “My golf game didn’t matter a whole lot to me one way or the other at that point.”
Still, Kirk considers himself lucky because he says he did not reach the lows that other people have experienced. He recognized he needed help and took that initiative, trying to get a handle on his addiction while he continued to play.
But he realized he could not do this alone. And after going through “a couple of relapses” he sought outside help and reached out to others.
“It’s definitely something that I’ve done, trying to just really make more of an effort than I had before to stay connected with the people that I need to stay connected with,” he said.
Part of that is avoiding hotels and renting houses with friends and peers on the Tour.
“I haven’t stayed in a hotel yet this entire year,” he said. He sounded as proud about that as he would if he just came through the Bear Trap in 3-under.
Kirk has entered six tournaments since the start of the year. He has two top-10 finishes, including runner-up at the Sony Open in Hawaii, and four top 20s.
But that does not come close to defining his biggest victory. Those come each time he walks off the golf course with a smile.
“I’m not someone that’s big on setting goals for this many wins or top 10s or world ranking because I have no control over any of that,” Kirk said. “I’ve got control over what I do every day on and off the golf course, and I’m just trying to do the best I can.”
